Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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