Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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