For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
