Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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