covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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