One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
my sisters under your porch take her home
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I smell like Dick and happiness
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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