Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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