I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
it's like heaven, but drunker
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
You ate ashes out of my bong
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
