You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
