Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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