your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
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