dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Girls should come with a carfax report
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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