I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
