Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
