did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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