I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
