he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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