I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
