the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize