I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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