The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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