HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
