If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
we're making bets on your personal life
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
