Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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