Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
my mouth tastes like poor choices
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Randomize
