well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
