I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize