I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize