i permit you to call me
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
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