I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
the room spins SO much faster in panama
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
They have beer where we have blood.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
