and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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