so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
