so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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