I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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