I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
