i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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