I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
In America we eat man semen.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize