i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
