actually, I'm a sock model
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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