We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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