She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize