no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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