I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
