Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
