Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
The feeling are messing with the penis
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
