very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
