"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize