She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
