There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
My ass is underappreciated
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize