I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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