Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
i can't believe i had my finger in that
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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